The Stock Market is plumetting; depending on your political leanings, our next candidate might be the anti-christ; and a movie about freaking talking dogs is on top of the box office.

Get ready to throw some tinfoil on, as the Apocalypse might really be headed our way.

Why do I say this?

Guns ‘N Roses’ CHINESE DEMOCRACY IS FINALLY COMING OUT.

Not a hoax, not an imaginary story. After 15 years of delays, Axl’s magnum opus (which I’m willing to bet is a load of shit) is finally hitting shelves as a Best Buy exclusive on November 23rd.

I know, you’re saying to yourself…How do we know it’s real? Best Buy actually has listings for it on their website COMPLETE WITH TRACKLISTINGS AND ARTWORK! End of an era folks!

Some of my more net-savvy readers may remember earlier this year when Dr. Pepper as a publicity stunt offered Free D-Pep if Axl should release the long-delayed GNR followup this year.

In an amazing response from today’s corporate America, in a statment to MTV.com, Dr. Pepper CONFIRMED they’re going to live up to their promise.

So sure, your stocks might be in the shitter, but remember this.  We’re finally getting a new Guns ‘N Roses album.  And some Dr. Pepper to wash the shitty aftertaste down.