The Hard Times:

BALTIMORE — Married couple Kenny Wallace and Audrey Tyler are praying to “Christ or whatever the fuck" that the band they’re seeing will not return to the stage for an encore, tired sources who have to be up for work in the morning confirm.
The Hard Times is my favorite non-Onion Onion-esq site. Articles like these really speak to me, an over 30, ex-regular indie rock show goer.