What a soulless piece of content.

Pierce Brosnan rules, but otherwise, this feels studio noted to death.

A series of heartless, strung-together setpieces, a spunky teen sidekick for reasons, a hero who needs to consider catchphrase timing to his murder timing.

I have no idea who this is for, besides Dwayne Johnson specifically.

Oh, and for as genuinely good as some of the visual effects are, there's one so surreal, so baffling, I can see it becoming a meme as the movie makes its way around in torrent form.

In short: Don't waste the time.